If memory serves, I heard the term "Helicopter Mom" not long after having birthed Nas. But when I hear my friend say that she is indeed a "Helicopter Mom" I have to laugh because she most definitely is! In her defense her kids are newly six and almost two - so they're young. But I'm the kind of Mom who has to fight the urge to hover over my kids, and Babe's words often play in my head "Let them play, they're fine!" Yeah, easy for YOU to say, DAD! I truly believe Dads parent differently than Moms do - which is probably why God's design was for kids to be raised by two parents. So while I'm battling my "smother mother" tendencies, he's able to glance up from time to time to be sure no one has been injured. Or he allows the youngest to lag several feet behind but, "He's FINE, I know where he IS!"
While flipping through my "Heart and Soul" magazine I ran across an article that suggested ways to allow kids to gain independence. None of the tips were over the top, but I definitely started thinking about how I can take yet another step back so the kids can continue to spread their wings - not too far, just far enough for their ages! I believe kids should become independent throughout their lives, 18 is no time to expect them to succeed when no foundation has been laid! So today I'm allowing them to walk home by themselves. Just typing those words makes my stomach sink. But...Jay is 10 and in fifth grade and Nas is seven in first grade. Initially I met Nas at his class line after school. Babe thought that was silly. So after a few weeks I had Jay grab Nas from his class line and I'd meet them after they crossed the street with the help of crossing guards. After another few weeks I told them, "Even if you don't see me, keep walking toward home." Thinking I was easing them into walking home just the two of them. So I guess today is the day. I ran it by Babe (and my Mom!) because they are his kids too, and he said, "Uh, YEAH!" I'm so thankful he balances me, we can't both be crazy!
That's my latest step toward helping the kids gain independence. The book offered 15 tips to allowing your kids to spread their wings:
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