The Little Things

In total, I spent 10 years under a cloud of depression. It is nothing short of a miracle that I can say that I am now free of it and have been for a few years. What I learned from that dark time in my life is that God will be there, even when you doubt He hears your cries, and that I can easily find myself back in that pit if I don't have a grateful spirit.

Being grateful, for me at least, took some practice. I started very basic - and when I feel like the world is caving in on me, I go back to the basics. I would be bored of my household duties, but quickly turned my thoughts to, "I may not feel like doing laundry today, but I'm so thankful we are able to have a washer and dryer in our home to do the laundry for our family of four."

There are days when I don't know what to cook and don't have a bunch of money to go out and buy anything to cook, but when I am grateful that we have food in our pantry, our freezer - both of them - and even enough leftovers in our fridge to feed us all, my perspective changes. Otherwise it is very easy for me to dwell on what I don't have, can't do, what I'm tired of doing, not doing, you name it.

But on any given day I remember to relish in some of my favorite little things. Things that I do with my family and things I do for myself. With Nas I look forward to playing Super Mario Brothers on the Wii after school because he is just so happy to have someone playing his favorite game with him. I don't just love being Luigi, or being told Daddy's better at the game than I am, but it's our little time together for just us.

With Jay, she loves to ride her bike and have me walk 'with' her. She doesn't even leave me! I think she enjoys the time for just us girls and I do too.

Then with Babe, 8:00 pm is my favorite time of day. We watch a movie, basketball, or something we've put on DVR, and just hang. It's our little piece of the day for just the two of us - and when he's out of town it's the time of day I miss him the most.

When Me Time seems pressing, I love to lay on the couch in the sun and read a magazine. There is nothing quite like it - I've learned cats are even smarter than I thought with the lounging in the sun thing! Or I may take a hot bubble bath where, inevitably, Nas will bring his action figures in for a random dive. He'll even invite me to play. I am sure to remember those moments because he definitely won't be doing that much longer.

I realize I live a very comfortable life. Things are not always perfect and every day is not easy, but when I start to think too hard on that which is less than perfect or those things I find difficult, I remember the little things I love about my life and enjoy with my family because in the end, that's all that will ever matter.